The Double Tap Conundrum

The Double Tap Conundrum

The entire millennial generation is hooked onto the social media. This is not bad or good either. It’s a personal choice. The need for social validation and being a pack goes back to the times when humans were hunting and staying in groups. Times changed drastically, we all started hunting for food using supermarkets and our arenas of food became the wonderfully decorated aisles and the sale boards. Our clothing issues changed from covering for protection to covering for self-confidence and happiness because who are we kidding, everyone feels confident when dressed properly and looking dapper. Our basic needs are still the same, with the addition of the internet and the accessories and additions that come along with it.

Social validation is one of the most important catalysts of human development. If a person feels like the society like and confirms him or her…then that person feels satisfied in being.

When a person, let’s say Jane, posts a photo of herself doing something. Jane’s picture gets likes from everywhere. Alex, her friend looks it up on the internet and has an urge to do it because if jane can do it, the he can too. So, in turn Alex puts up a better version of himself doing that particular activity. Alex has several friends who like and comment on his posts. These friends start doing that activity. Somewhere, somehow, this activity becomes a hit everywhere. From pop stars and celebrities to the very common lay people with internet and a decent camera get engaged in doing that activity. The news channels, print media, tabloids all go crazy over covering this story. This is the birth of something known as a social media challenge.

These challenges can have a very good effect on people that would galvanize them toward becoming better people. Challenges keep the people doing new and good things … but is that always true?

The above story of Jane, Alex and their friends was the idealizsed version of it. A version where everyone knows that they are doing it for fun, where it won’t matter much to them and it is a method of being happy. Let me make the lesser known story of the person who is hurting because of it known. Let’s call our protagonist here Alyssa. Alyssa, a teenager, who also has a phone and internet sees the new challenge. She too feels like doing that challenge. She does it. Unlike others, Alyssa gets detrimental comments from her own friends about her characteristics. She gets told by some faceless person that she is too thin or too fat or that her body doesn’t conform to the social standards. Many of her friends too do that. Alyssa, now without validation, tries to get it another time. She does a new challenge and posts new photos. The trolls don’t stop. The faceless monsters now become something that haunts Alyssa all the time. Every time she decides to do something offline, the storm of self-doubt makes her retreat even before stepping out. Alyssa decides that she has no value in the real life since the “society” that she sought validation from shunned her. All of her real friends try to reach out to her, but since Alyssa is so caught up in the virtual world, they eventually give up trying. A few of them still keep knocking at her door, but our dear Alyssa is already far gone. Through the closed door, her friends keep telling her to leave everything and cut all the negative out of her life. They tell her to start a journey toward the light and seek the real meaning of life. Alyssa does just that. She cuts up her veins, veins that have all the blood which carries the genes and wanting to be validated. She lets it flow and lets all the negativity loose and into the drain. She begins a journey towards the light.

Today, there are so many Alyssa’s around us. So many of our friends, peers are struggling with mental health issues all arising from social media. This side of social media has taken so many people with it. 

We must now ask some basic integral questions to ourselves. We must look in the mirror of our souls and ask,

Who are you?

What makes you happy?

Are you content?

Are you hurting?

And the most important of all,

Are you living to the fullest?

We must all become pillars of support for each other. We must spread positivity and love, both online and offline. Shunning someone because they might post something that is not “socially correct” is awful. We must now realize that there is nothing like being socially fit. Society should not be what makes a set of rules and squares to fit in. It must be something that opens up its arms for everyone and accepts them irrespective of their vices. A society is the feeling of “vasudhaiva kutumbakam” i.e. the world is our family. A healthier world where a child in Africa is happy because someone in Korea shared a new story. Where the people from different countries look at the plethora of problems in each other’s country and offer solutions.

A world where the importance of the double taps for validation fades away and double taps and positive comments pour in from everywhere making the world a happy place to live in.